Song lyrics
I don't think I could find a way to make it on this earth.
— What's up, family? Yeah, it's yo cousin Carl, man, just givin' you a call, man. I know you been havin' a lot on yo mind lately, and I know you feel like, you know, people ain't been prayin' for you. But you have to understand this, man, that we are a cursed people. Deuteronomy 28:28 says: "The Lord shall smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart." See, family, that's why you feel like you feel like you got a chip on your shoulder. Until you finally get the memo, you will always feel that way...
Why God, why God do I gotta suffer?
Pain in my heart carry burdens full of struggle.
Why God, why God do I gotta bleed?
Every stone thrown at you restin' at my feet.
Why God, why God do I gotta suffer?
Earth is no more, won't you burn this muhfucka?
I don't think I could find a way to make it on this earth.
[Verse 1:]
I beat yo ass, keep talkin' back,
I beat yo ass, who bought you that?
You stole it, I beat yo ass if you say that game is broken,
I beat yo ass if you jump on my couch,
I beat yo ass if you walk in this house,
With tears in your eyes, runnin' from Poo Poo and Prentice,
Go back outside, I beat yo ass, lil' nigga!
That homework better be finished, I beat yo ass,
Your teachers better not be bitchin' 'bout you in class,
That pizza better not be wasted, you eat it all,
That TV better not be loud if you got it on,
Them Jordans better not get dirty when I just bought 'em,
Better not hear 'bout you humpin' on Keisha's daughter,
Better not hear you got caught up,
I beat yo ass, you better not run to your father,
I beat yo ass, you know my patience runnin' thin,
I got beaucoup payments to make,
County building's on my ass,
Tryna take my food stamps away,
I beat yo ass if you tell them social workers he live here,
I beat yo ass if I beat yo ass twice and you still here,
Seven years old, think you run this house by yourself?
Nigga, you gon' fear me if you don't fear no one else!
[Chorus:]
If I could smoke fear away, I'd roll that mothafucka up,
And then I'd take two puffs.
I'm high now, I'm high now,
I'm high now, I'm high now,
Life's a bitch, pull them panties to the side now.
I don't think I could find a way to make it on this earth.
[Verse 2:]
I'll prolly die anonymous,
I'll prolly die with promises,
I'll prolly die walkin' back home from the candy house,
I'll prolly die because these colors are standin' out,
I'll prolly die because I ain't know Demarcus was snitchin',
I'll prolly die at these house parties fuckin' with bitches,
I'll prolly die from witnesses leavin' me falsed accused,
I'll prolly die from thinkin' that me and your hood was cool,
Or maybe die from pressin' the line, actin' too extra,
Or maybe die because these smokers are more than desperate,
I'll prolly die from one of these bats and blue badges,
Body slammed on black and white paint, my bones snappin',
Or maybe die from panic or die from bein' too lax,
Or die from waitin' on it, die 'cause I'm movin' too fast,
I'll prolly die tryna buy weed at the apartments,
I'll prolly die tryna diffuse two homies arguin',
I'll prolly die 'cause that's what you do when you're 17,
All worries in a hurry, I wish I controlled things.
[Chorus:]
If I could smoke fear away, I'd roll that mothafucka up,
And then I'd take two puffs.
I'm high now, I'm high now,
I'm high now, I'm high now,
Life's a bitch, pull them panties to the side now.
Now...
[Verse 3:]
When I was 27, I grew accustomed to more fear,
Accumulated 10 times over throughout the years,
My newfound life made all of me magnified,
How many accolades do I need to block denial?
The shock value of my success put bolts in me,
All this money, is God playin' a joke on me?
Is it for the moment, and will he see me as Job –
Take it from me and leave me worse than I was before?
At 27, my biggest fear was losin' it all,
Scared to spend money, had me sleepin' from hall to hall,
Scared to go back to Section 8 with my mama stressin',
30 shows a month and I still won't buy me no Lexus.
What is an advisor? Somebody that's holdin' my checks
Just to fuck me over and put my finances in debt?
I read a case about Rihanna's accountant and wondered,
How did the bad gal feel when she looked at them numbers?
The type of shit'll make me flip out,
And just kill something, drill something
Get ill and fill ratchets with a lil' something.
I practiced runnin' from fear, guess I had some good luck,
At 27 years old, my biggest fear was bein' judged,
How they look at me, reflect on myself, my family, my city.
What they say 'bout me reveal
If my reputation would miss me.
What they see from me
Would trickle down generations in time.
What they hear from me
Would make 'em highlight my simplest lines.
[Verse 4:]
I'm talkin' fear, fear of losin' creativity,
I'm talkin' fear, fear of missin' out on you and me,
I'm talkin' fear, fear of losin' loyalty from pride,
'Cause my DNA won't let me involve in the light of God,
I'm talkin' fear, fear that my humbleness is gone,
I'm talkin' fear, fear that love ain't livin' here no more,
I'm talkin' fear, fear that it's wickedness or weakness,
Fear, whatever it is, both is distinctive,
Fear, what happens on Earth stays on Earth
And I can't take these feelings with me,
So hopefully they disperse
Within fourteen tracks carried out over wax.
Searchin' for resolutions until somebody get back.
Fear, what happens on Earth stays on Earth
And I can't take these feelings with me,
So hopefully they disperse
Within fourteen tracks, carried out over wax,
Wonderin' if I'm livin' through fear or livin' through rap.
[Bridge:]
Damn!
Goddamn you!
Goddamn me!
Goddamn us!
Goddamn we!
Goddamn us all!
[Outro:]
Verse two says you: “Only have I known of all the families of the Earth, therefore I will punish you for all your iniquities.” So until we come back to these commandments, until you come back to these commandments, we're gonna feel this way, we're gonna be under this curse. Because He said He's gonna punish us, the so-called Blacks, Hispanics, and Native American Indians, are the true children of Israel. We are the Israelites according to the Bible. The children of Israel, He's gonna punish us for our iniquities, for our disobedience, because we chose to follow other gods that aren't His son, so the Lord, thy God, chasten thee. So, just like you chasten your own son, He's gonna chastise you because He loves you. So that's why we get chastised, that's why we're in the position we're in. Until we come back to these laws, statutes and commandments, and do what the Lord said, these curses are gonna be upon us. We're gonna be at a lower state in this life that we live here in today, in the United States of America. I love you, son, and I pray for you. God bless you, shalom.
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